Trust

Trust.

 I wrote this note during a season in which i realized God was preparing me for my mate. The more the prophecies came, the more nervous i became. I realized that due to my past relationships, i had to once again learn how to trust a human with my heart. It was easy to trust God because I know his character and even though he can be unpredictable, he is still good. But a human being, that was a different story. So i spent several weeks, sit with God learning how to trust. It is pivotal to trust if you fully want to love and be loved. These are just some thoughts from my journey.

The key to learning how to trust again and healing from past hurts is by learning how to identify those around you that can hold you heart, and then giving it to them one piece at a time. Healing requires releasing pieces of yourself into someone Else's hands. I am now learning that. Actually this morning, the lord had me write down some of my deepest hurts and pains that are keeping from moving forward in my walk with daddy God. I sometimes i am a better writer than speaker, so I thought as I wrote the things down that was it. However, I knew it was not enough to hide those things in my journal. I knew that I had to share them, that I had to release them. In doing so I was trusting the person I was giving these pieces of me too. I was doing the very thing which I had felt I was unable to do. Jesus told me to tell my friend, and to let my friend hold this in his hand. It was scary but it was good. 1. because I was allowing myself to feel things I hadn’t allowed myself to feel in along time. I was allowing myself to go into that place, of confusion and disappointment. I allowed myself to be transparent and in doing so I allowed myself to trust.

  I am now realizing that I have to take my heart and allow someone else to hold it. It’s easier to say I will give it to God and we should. But I think true healing comes as you give your heart to a fallible human, who is capable of breaking it but you are TRUSTING they won’t. We all have to come to that place where we can be brave like that. I do not suggest throwing your heart to swine, but I believe God brings certain people in your life so that they can hold it for you when you are unable to put it back together. They do not need to fix it, they just need to hold the pieces together, when you can’t hold it together. We are communal beings, we need each other. God has called us to hold pieces of people and in due time help put them back together with the wisdom of the Lord. Thanks to those that hold the pieces of my heart that I am ashamed of, or scared to deal with, or too painful. Thanks helping me heal, thanks for listening, and restoring, Thanks to Jesus for friendship.